I'm beginning to lose hope and that I will be like this for the rest of my life. I think that others hold the power to our success - whether it is socially or professionally in a job. For example, when I apply for a job, I immediately think "It's not like I'm going to get it... I'll never have the chance to earn a single dollar myself in this lifetime...". The fact that I have been rejected in every application has made me think I'm just wasting my time and the interviewers probably think "You wish...".
Same goes for friendships... I mean I WANT to be in a functional social circle but I could only dream of it. I don't know if these guys are exactly my friends - I have a hard time calling people 'friends' anyway. I met this group during my first year at uni (I have transferred elsewhere now); although we're not close, I'd still be invited to their occasional picnics - that's about the only time I see them and the only tagged photos of me on Facebook are during those picnics - pathetic. They probably think I never go out and the only time I do is to their picnics.
I also have some links to another group at uni which I joined last year - we hung out a few times.
The problem is I want to introduce some of the people in the two groups to each other and try to 'merge' them to form one group but they are simply my acquaintances and they have their own 'main' friends. I can't seem to initiate an invitation myself to those groups since I don't have much of my own friends to bring along or ones which I rather they not know about.
I want to cry when I see my younger sister (eighteen years old) having a life - she would come home late, sleep then leave early the next day for more fun. She's rarely home now. She also works and has a BF. Whereas for me, I feel like I am a 'younger' brother with serious issues. I get upset when she comes home and asks 'So what did use do today?' (referring to me and our parents). I'm always home with them and it's worse now since I'm in my uni break and rarely go out.
I want to be part of a group where stories can be shared and everyone is close but I just can't... I have NEVER celebrated my birthday with my friends for instance... because no one is close with me. Like today, my sister and her friends friend went to pick up a cake for their mutual friend's birthday - I wish I got that with my own friends.
Would it be weird to try and be closer with acquaintances you have known for a long time but never bothered with? I'm worried I'd bore them if I invited them to hang out.
Am I bound to fail? I'll never get a job, a GF, friends and a life... T_T
Same goes for friendships... I mean I WANT to be in a functional social circle but I could only dream of it. I don't know if these guys are exactly my friends - I have a hard time calling people 'friends' anyway. I met this group during my first year at uni (I have transferred elsewhere now); although we're not close, I'd still be invited to their occasional picnics - that's about the only time I see them and the only tagged photos of me on Facebook are during those picnics - pathetic. They probably think I never go out and the only time I do is to their picnics.
I also have some links to another group at uni which I joined last year - we hung out a few times.
The problem is I want to introduce some of the people in the two groups to each other and try to 'merge' them to form one group but they are simply my acquaintances and they have their own 'main' friends. I can't seem to initiate an invitation myself to those groups since I don't have much of my own friends to bring along or ones which I rather they not know about.
I want to cry when I see my younger sister (eighteen years old) having a life - she would come home late, sleep then leave early the next day for more fun. She's rarely home now. She also works and has a BF. Whereas for me, I feel like I am a 'younger' brother with serious issues. I get upset when she comes home and asks 'So what did use do today?' (referring to me and our parents). I'm always home with them and it's worse now since I'm in my uni break and rarely go out.
I want to be part of a group where stories can be shared and everyone is close but I just can't... I have NEVER celebrated my birthday with my friends for instance... because no one is close with me. Like today, my sister and her friends friend went to pick up a cake for their mutual friend's birthday - I wish I got that with my own friends.
Would it be weird to try and be closer with acquaintances you have known for a long time but never bothered with? I'm worried I'd bore them if I invited them to hang out.
Am I bound to fail? I'll never get a job, a GF, friends and a life... T_T
via Social Anxiety Forum http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f26/how-many-of-you-think-we-were-born-to-fail-242642/
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