Not aplug and I know it's just a crutch...

About 13 years ago I had an accident; I fell about 13 ft on to a crowded nite club dance floor... I'm not ashamed to say I was on a lot of "things" at the time. I cannot remember bar a flash of people staring at me ... with in 3 months I began to take panic attacks when people looked at me or began to pay attention to what I was saying... 3 or more people even my friends. Now this has screwed me for job interviews where they ask you to "speak about yourself" and all attention is on me! PANIC and i mean bad:

It starts with a tremble in my hand... then my mind notices that and my brain kicks it up a notch and my voice gos, then my body starts to vibrate and my vision blurs... it's terrifying.



I once was a singer in a band and was in school the first person to to get up to read in class: right now I love comedy and spend time at comedy clubs and write gags for my friends. I recently started taking "propranolol" - job interview I walked it on 30mg no problem and have just forced myself into self exposure therapy : i am taking part in a friends comedy general knowledge quiz in front of maybe 30-50 people. I hope it works out.

My friend knows if i walk out he can replace me and is on stand by...

via Social Anxiety Forum http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f9/not-aplug-and-i-know-its-just-a-crutch-280913/