Ok so I was homeschooled for the first three grades and then I was unschooled meaning, you let the child choose what he/she wants to learn and when. I don't mean let them go wild (though some people do!) it's to encourage learning by doing things such as field trips, doing sports, anything. In theory it's a good idea, for some people it's worked out great but for me? It was terrible idea.
I was struggling a lot especially with English and Math to begin with, I couldn't grasp it. I felt stupid and I would start crying sometimes I was so frustrated with 'school'.
My brother who is about a year older then me is really, really smart he jumped two grades because everything was easy. I on the other hand am the opposite, I mean I'm smart but not in the same way that he is. I excel at visual things like sports and art. So a lot of the time I felt like I had to catch up with him, I had to do better, I had to know these things, I had to be faster when I just wanted to give up and go outside and play or read my books. And I did give up most of the time I would just write down whatever number I thought it was and left it. I barely scraped by in math (we had yearly test things, due to homeschool laws in some states)
And these unschoolers, they can get jobs and go to college without all the usual things people normally get (GED, High school diploma, various tests). THE CATCH, you need to be actively going on field trips, reading educational books, volunteering, etc. Stuff I didn't do nor thought I needed to. Because 1. I was shy and I didn't go out much though I wanted to. 2. I was sheltered and didn't think I needed to. Because I was a kid. I didn't grasp WHY I needed this stuff when I was younger.
In short, I AM AN IDIOT. :no ARGH!!
ANYWAYS, now at 21 I feel incredibly stupid. I want to go to college, but I need to have a GED plus passing additional tests. A job? I need a HS diploma at least. I looked at the courses for ABE (Adult Basic Education) and most of it I have no idea how the hell I'm going to learn all of this. Just reading the titles freaks me out! And most of the stuff I'm not even going to use! Because I want to run a small business, you don't need science and chemistry for that! Nor history. Math and English, and people skills. (ok and a whole but of other things as well but this post is long enough)
Then there's my SA, I can't even do half of this stuff from that alone not including my lack of educational problems as well.
I feel so alone and like such a freak. How often to you run into people like me who know next to nothing? NEVER.
I do realize that it's society's version of education and that pretty much everyone doesn't use half of it but I still can't get rid of the feeling that I've failed some huge monumental thing and that when I do go to ABE that the people there will judge me for not knowing at least half of everything there because I'm so young.
Am I freak? :sigh
I was struggling a lot especially with English and Math to begin with, I couldn't grasp it. I felt stupid and I would start crying sometimes I was so frustrated with 'school'.
My brother who is about a year older then me is really, really smart he jumped two grades because everything was easy. I on the other hand am the opposite, I mean I'm smart but not in the same way that he is. I excel at visual things like sports and art. So a lot of the time I felt like I had to catch up with him, I had to do better, I had to know these things, I had to be faster when I just wanted to give up and go outside and play or read my books. And I did give up most of the time I would just write down whatever number I thought it was and left it. I barely scraped by in math (we had yearly test things, due to homeschool laws in some states)
And these unschoolers, they can get jobs and go to college without all the usual things people normally get (GED, High school diploma, various tests). THE CATCH, you need to be actively going on field trips, reading educational books, volunteering, etc. Stuff I didn't do nor thought I needed to. Because 1. I was shy and I didn't go out much though I wanted to. 2. I was sheltered and didn't think I needed to. Because I was a kid. I didn't grasp WHY I needed this stuff when I was younger.
In short, I AM AN IDIOT. :no ARGH!!
ANYWAYS, now at 21 I feel incredibly stupid. I want to go to college, but I need to have a GED plus passing additional tests. A job? I need a HS diploma at least. I looked at the courses for ABE (Adult Basic Education) and most of it I have no idea how the hell I'm going to learn all of this. Just reading the titles freaks me out! And most of the stuff I'm not even going to use! Because I want to run a small business, you don't need science and chemistry for that! Nor history. Math and English, and people skills. (ok and a whole but of other things as well but this post is long enough)
Then there's my SA, I can't even do half of this stuff from that alone not including my lack of educational problems as well.
I feel so alone and like such a freak. How often to you run into people like me who know next to nothing? NEVER.
I do realize that it's society's version of education and that pretty much everyone doesn't use half of it but I still can't get rid of the feeling that I've failed some huge monumental thing and that when I do go to ABE that the people there will judge me for not knowing at least half of everything there because I'm so young.
Am I freak? :sigh
via Social Anxiety Forum http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f26/adult-education-295617/
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