I'm a senior in high school and I pretty much ruined my chance of graduating this year with my class. You see, I've always been the kind of person who hated school. Hated waking up early in the morning, riding the public transportation, dealing with the loud and obnoxious teenagers at school and so on. All these things and plus combined with the stuff I am also dealing with in my personal life has transformed me into kind of depressed and anxiety ridden person.
Being depressed caused me to have a lack of motivation to do anything productive. So, instead of going to school like all the other students, I would just skip school and just stay home. My mother didn't like the fact that I didn't go to school everyday. She told me to go to school, but most of the time I didn't listen to her. Eventually she would just give in and let me stay home anyway. Now a days, I don't think she really cares anymore. My father just straight up doesn't give a damn.
Now school is almost over and finals are coming up soon. I talked to the student guidance counselor 4 weeks ago about my situation. She pretty much told me to come to school the last couple of weeks and do some make up work and so on. I came to school a few times after are conversation, but only a few times though. At this point kind of doesn't really matter.
It's funny really. I've had several opportunities to change things around for the better this year, but instead I just decided to stay home. I feel like a full time failure right now and all this pain and guilt has been eating away at me for weeks now.
I feel like going back in time and kicking myself in the balls..... :l
Being depressed caused me to have a lack of motivation to do anything productive. So, instead of going to school like all the other students, I would just skip school and just stay home. My mother didn't like the fact that I didn't go to school everyday. She told me to go to school, but most of the time I didn't listen to her. Eventually she would just give in and let me stay home anyway. Now a days, I don't think she really cares anymore. My father just straight up doesn't give a damn.
Now school is almost over and finals are coming up soon. I talked to the student guidance counselor 4 weeks ago about my situation. She pretty much told me to come to school the last couple of weeks and do some make up work and so on. I came to school a few times after are conversation, but only a few times though. At this point kind of doesn't really matter.
It's funny really. I've had several opportunities to change things around for the better this year, but instead I just decided to stay home. I feel like a full time failure right now and all this pain and guilt has been eating away at me for weeks now.
I feel like going back in time and kicking myself in the balls..... :l
via Social Anxiety Forum http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f35/screwing-things-up-for-myself-413169/
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